The numbers agree: I had to spend my movie money on new tires this weekend.
Real talk, guys. How have we not developed a way to prevent potholes? Scientists can build a machine that might prove the existence of parallel universes, but keeping our highways smooth and driveable eludes us?
It’s a conspiracy. That’s what it is. Some sort of agreement between the tire companies and whoever paves our roads*. And I’m going to get to the bottom of it. Use the hashtag #PotholeTruth if you’d like to join my cause. Let’s flush these fuckers out, America!
Side note: do you guys think other universes have the same movies as us? Like, maybe their GoodFellas stars Jack Black. Think about it.
*The mayor?
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