The numbers agree: Minions have invaded our homeland, and they’re looking to win the war.
With an estimated weekend take of $115 million, it’s clear that Minions is aggressively trying to overtake our beautiful country. And given the weak performance of our alleged homeland protectors — defenders by the name of Jurassic World ($18 million), Inside Out ($17 million) and Terminator: Genisys ($13 million) — we are in need of a new hero to protect us.
Will it be Ant-Man? Trainwreck? Pixels?
We can only sit here and wait, uttering silent prayers for a country that slips through our fingers like sand.
Be gone, ye Minions. Be gone.