The numbers agree: Tom in accounting has been blabbing for an hour.
I usually try to avoid these things like the plague, but my go-to excuse didn’t work today (I guess a fifth dead grandmother is a little suspicious). So while my second least favorite co-worker puts everyone in conference room B to sleep, let’s take a look at the weekend totals:
Spectre — $35,400,000
The Peanuts Movie — $24,200,000
Love the Coopers — $8,400,000
The Martian — $6,725,000
The 33 — $5,845,000
UPDATE (2:05 pm): Whoa! Tom just blamed the company’s poor performance on the owner’s micromanaging!
UPDATE #2 (2:08 pm): The owner called Tom a word I’m not comfortable repeating here.
UPDATE #3 (2:09 pm): Tom quit. Or he was fired. Both kind of happened at the same time.
UPDATE #4 (2:39 pm): Holy shit! Tom left with $5,000 in petty cash! Cops are being called.
UPDATE #5 (2:41 pm): If you’re a Philly local, please keep an eye out for Tom’s silver RAV4. It has a “Support Farting” ribbon on the back.